VIDEO-Opinion | Weird Al Presents: ‘America Is Doomed, the Musical’ - The New York Times

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transcript

Weird Al Presents: ‘America Is Doomed, the Musical’

Weird Al Yankovic’s take on the weird debate.

We’re all doomed! People are breathing out this living poison and flooding to my orifices. I lost my car keys. Had to steal my neighbor’s segway to get here today. The way I crashed in this dumpster. These kids were making a video and now I’m on TikTok. Excuse me. Yeah being not hysterical, despite you know, things? Oh I can do that. Dignified. Gentlemen welcome to the first presidential debate. Our first question is in the key of G sharp minor is. [SINGS] I’m so sorry. 2020 is a raging hellscape. Any ideas on how to stop a worldwide plague. We should be providing people the help they need. He knew back in February it was a deadly disease. What did he do. He’s on tape acknowledging he knew. He waited and waited and waited. And he didn’t even tell you. President Trump did a phenomenal job. People said well we got the gowns. We made the ventilators we got the masks. I don’t wear masks like him every time you see him he’s got a mask the biggest mask the biggest mask I’ve ever seen. Will we get back all the jobs we lost or should we set up 11 million etsy shops. My economic plan would create one trillion in economic growth. He has no intention of making it better for you get government back to work. Well, it was me me in football and I’m very happy with the going to be. They want to get the cows, the cow in the West Wing. Here’s the deal. He has no idea what he’s talking about. But he said you can inject bleach. They cheat! If the Supreme Court is where’s the guac and sour cream? The American people have a right to say who is the supreme court nominee. The biggest thing to survive another day. We have a phenomenal nominee. I ran out of questions but still got a while. It’s time to drop some bars. Let’s see how you free style. In Europe they live their forest cities they call forest cities. It’s a forest city. He talks about the art of the deal. China’s perfected the art of this steal. Bad things happen in Philadelphia bad things. He’s just afraid to stand back and stand by. He’s said there are very fine people on both sides. He said maybe you should drop a nuclear weapon on hurricanes. The cars have computers all over the place. Who is it gunna be? They want to take out the cows, the west wing. Here’s the deal. He has no idea what he’s talking about We’re living in the apocalypse. I’m begging you to put a stop to this. He doesn’t have a plan, including trees COVID 19 hurricanes with names past the letter Z conspiracy theories about vaccines murder Hornets coming from across the sea too many memes about World War III Can’t tell you what’s hell or reality earthquake through it away cause I dropped my keys in the crack between the cup holder and my car seat. They want to get the cows, the cow in the wind. Here’s the deal. He has no idea what he’s talking about. He said he could inject some bleach. They cheat! If you’ll excuse me. The murder hornets come out at midnight. So I’m going to go home and seal the door to my purge room and I’ll take the light breeze with me.

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Opinion Video features innovative video journalism commentary — argued essays, Op-Ed videos, documentaries, and fact-based explanation of current affairs. The videos are produced by both outside video makers and The Times’s Opinion Video team.

Opinion Video features innovative video journalism commentary — argued essays, Op-Ed videos, documentaries, and fact-based explanation of current affairs. The videos are produced by both outside video makers and The Times’s Opinion Video team.

https://www.nytimes.com/video/opinion/100000007370133/presidential-debate-weird-al.html